Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Strange times

Note to self: do not read stupid vampire books which describe the pregnancy of a woman giving birth to a half vampire/half human baby. I have stopped reading and turned to an old copy of the New Yorker for sweet relief from the blood drinking vampire baby breaking the heroine's bones inside her.

That said, there is definitely a larger than life creature in here. When I look at first born photos I am amazed at how big the babies are. It is crazy to think I have a seven pound baby nestled inside me right now. I can't help but think he is going nuts in there all cramped and claustrophobic, but I guess he doesn't know any different.

Strange times now. Every day I wonder if this will be the day? The other day I was lying in bed and I projectile vomited into a nearby t-shirt. Lovely. For the rest of the day I felt nauseous and started to think this was one of the first signs of labor, ignoring the fact that I just ate two sandwiches with smoked salmon heaped on them. Then yesterday I started feeling mild cramps and started thinking, oh, maybe now?

So every day I am awaiting. I try and sit on the couch and listen to relaxing music to quell my anxiety. He will come when he comes. I will enjoy being a good mother to him. He will be a cute baby. It's difficult though. On the precipice of something so big.

Meanwhile, I bought him his first books yesterday. It was a cool feeling. Knowing that I was going to contribute to this little one's life. I have the responsibility of teaching and loving. My favorite of all books: "Why I Love My Daddy". I can't wait for my guy to read it to him.

It's the small things.

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